saying goodbye

I never knew that choosing to put my son in daycare would affect my life the way it has. I always just assumed that we would drop Deacon off at school and pick him up after work and I never thought past that. Fortunately and Unfortunately I have developed very sincere relationships with most of his teachers. Every time we transition Deacon into an older room I cry. It's mixed emotions of me can't believing that he is getting so big, but also knowing that I have to leave a room and the teachers that mean so much to me. Sure we continue to see each other down the hall or facebook, but it just isn't the same.

A couple weeks ago I found out that one of Deacon's teachers was leaving the center. I can't blame her. She had the wonderful opportunity to teach in a Montessori school close to her home and it was Montessori that she had worked so hard for. Today was Ms. Kecia's last day and all day I kept my composure--I didn't let it bother me, until I pulled into the parking lot. It hit me like a ton of bricks: the lump in my throat, the eyes welling like little pools and my heart shattered...today I had to say goodbye.

I got Deacon from his new classroom and every so cautiously walked down the hallway trying to find Ms. Kecia. I rounded the corner and there she was. In my head, I said, "don't cry, don't cry" I even told her I wasn't going to cry today. But then I said it, I said, "I love you, Kecia and I want to thank you for everything..." boom. Waterworks. game over.

Doug and I have a very special relationship with all of Deacon's teachers. The truth of the matter is we feel as though it is our obligation to. That school, those teachers see Deacon more than I do throughout the week--so it is vital to Doug and I to cultivate those relationships. Kecia had Deacon very early on...in the Infant room as a matter of fact. Ms. Kecia moved from the 3 room down to Infant 1 shortly after Deacon started Treasure House. Ms. Kecia and Ms. Becky were my lifelines and I don't know if they actually know how much of a blessing they were/are to my family.

Kecia endured the pesty notes a new mother sends...apparently I didn't think they knew how to make cereal for him :) But never did she or Becky laugh at me for being too cautious or overly concerned or down right crazy--but rather they cradled me and my family with love and care. They empathized with me and helped me through a very difficult first year of learning how to be a mom! They helped me find the confidence I knew I had in me to be a mom. It was in that first year I realized that daycare was more than just watching children--it was creating a bond with families--it takes a village you know.

I am so happy for my dear friend, but Treasure House won't be the same--sure we have such great teachers and staff and I am sure someone will be able to take her place--but it will never replace who Kecia was and what she means to my family.

Kecia--You are an amazing person. Your patience, kindness and down right selfless giving has been an instrument of grace to my family. We wish you nothing but the best and this is not goodbye--I totally plan on seeing you again soon (maybe a Girls night out, ok? AND I still need to photograph your beautiful daughter!!) The new school you are going to is so lucky to have you and I hope that they know that! Love you so much!

saying goodbye is so hard, but I'd rather say goodbye than not have ever met you. You have impacted my life, doug's life and for sure Deacon's life for the better.